Sunday, September 14, 2008

June 10

This day started off very badly. When I left the hospital the night before, I made Natasha promise to call if she needed anything. I told her that I didn't want to be in her way, but that I wanted to be there if she needed ANYTHING. At 9 am I got a call from Denise (the director of the agency). She told me that Natasha had decided to keep the baby. She said she didn't expect him to look sooo much like her other kids, and he needed her because he was so sick. Denise told me that she had talked to Natasha and explained how things were going to work. She told her that if she decided not to place the baby, the State of Utah would take him into custody because of the drugs in his system, and that they would then contact the state of Minnesota and they would take her other children away. Natasha told Denise that Minnesota told her that if the baby didn't test positive for heroine that they wouldn't take her other kids. Denise told her she really thought she was wrong.

At around 11am Natasha called me. She asked if I was mad at her. I told her that I was concerned about the situation, but that it was normal to second guess. She asked if we still wanted the baby and I assured her that we did. She told me that she was going to sign the papers, and that she was just being selfish this morning, and she hated herself for it. She told me that she had talked to Luis (her husband) and they had decided that if they had $3500 they could start new, get a better apartment. She said she was going to ask Denise for the money but even if she didn't get it she would sign the papers.

At this point I still hadn't seen the baby. I wanted desperately to hold him in my arms. She asked if we would like to come see him. I told her I would love to, and she said she would call me back when she had cleared it with the nursery. An hour and a half later she called, hysterically crying and kept apologizing. She said "I'm sorry I'm sorry." My heart sunk. I thought something had happened to the baby. I got her to calm down enough to tell me what had happened. She told me that Minnesota DCFS had come and taken Jose (her 4 year old) from Luis. She kept saying she was sorry and that she would sign the papers, just please give her back her baby (Jose). She thought that I had called Minnesota in order to get her to sign the papers. I told her that I had nothing to do with it, and that I would do anything I could to help her, but I didn't know if I could do anything. As soon as I hung up we left for the hospital.

When we got there Denise told us what happened before we got to Natasha. Natasha, trying to prove that she wouldn't get her kids taken, called Minnesota DCFS and asked if she tried to parent the baby, if they would take away her other kids. Of course this triggered interest and they started looking into it and found that her husband was currently using heroine, and they took custody of her 4 children.

After we got there and made sure she was okay, she took us in one at a time to see the baby. I went in first with her. He looked so fragile in his isolette. As I held him in my arms for the first time, I couldn't help but cry. He was REAL! He was so beautiful, and God willing, he would be ours within the next 24 hours. We took several pictures, and then I decided to let Clint have his turn. He went in, and took pictures as well, both of us trying to get acquainted with our new addition. After a while we left so Natasha could sign relinquishment without the pressure of us in the other room. We got the call that the papers were signed at 10:30 pm.